Thursday, November 4, 2010

Emotions Run High

I told the hubs at the beginning of football season that he was way too cocky about how great his fantasy teams were and how all 3 were going to win. He's lost almost half his games, and each time he whines about it, I look at him and go, "Told ya you were too cocky."

Well, it turns out I should have taken my own advice. I got cocky about this whole stimming bit. The drug-administering was going good, I was feeling little to no s/e and I was just going to breeze through this! Ummm... wrong! Yesterday, the news that I wasn't progressing at the rate they had hoped and my E2 was only 338 threw me for a whole new kind of loop. It knocked the wind from my sails in a big hurry. And so, here I am a day later and my meds kicked up a notch and I'm a basketcase.

I know I am still on pretty low doses and I don't know how some of you function! I've looked at your med levels compared to mine and I seriously give you mad applause for getting through the day in one piece. I've already cried 3 times this morning. Over nothing! I'm hoping that this is a signal that the boost in meds is working and my E2 level is rising - because that's what I've been told is supposed to happen. Because if that isn't what's happening, then I'm really just losing my mind.

I just keep repeating, every time a negative/worrisome thought enters my head, "God is in control. Only He has control over what's happening, let Him worry about it." And then I go on with my day. I think I've said it about 15 times in the last hour. But it's true.

4 comments:

  1. Praying that it gets better and your numbers improve!

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  2. Sending you prayers and here is a quote that as someone going through IUI#3's 2WW needed to hear this morning...Hold everything in your hands lightly, otherwise it hurts when God pries your fingers open. ~Corrie ten Boom

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  3. Hang in there sweetie. I felt the same way going into IVF #1.. I actually said to my therapist, this really isn't that hard. :) We all get a a little cocky.
    I hope your numbers get much better with increased drugs. Thinking of you.

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  4. I am crossing my fingers for you....hang in there and just think positive thoughts...it will all be worthwhile in the end...

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