Thursday, November 4, 2010

Emotions Run High

I told the hubs at the beginning of football season that he was way too cocky about how great his fantasy teams were and how all 3 were going to win. He's lost almost half his games, and each time he whines about it, I look at him and go, "Told ya you were too cocky."

Well, it turns out I should have taken my own advice. I got cocky about this whole stimming bit. The drug-administering was going good, I was feeling little to no s/e and I was just going to breeze through this! Ummm... wrong! Yesterday, the news that I wasn't progressing at the rate they had hoped and my E2 was only 338 threw me for a whole new kind of loop. It knocked the wind from my sails in a big hurry. And so, here I am a day later and my meds kicked up a notch and I'm a basketcase.

I know I am still on pretty low doses and I don't know how some of you function! I've looked at your med levels compared to mine and I seriously give you mad applause for getting through the day in one piece. I've already cried 3 times this morning. Over nothing! I'm hoping that this is a signal that the boost in meds is working and my E2 level is rising - because that's what I've been told is supposed to happen. Because if that isn't what's happening, then I'm really just losing my mind.

I just keep repeating, every time a negative/worrisome thought enters my head, "God is in control. Only He has control over what's happening, let Him worry about it." And then I go on with my day. I think I've said it about 15 times in the last hour. But it's true.


  1. Praying that it gets better and your numbers improve!

  2. Sending you prayers and here is a quote that as someone going through IUI#3's 2WW needed to hear this morning...Hold everything in your hands lightly, otherwise it hurts when God pries your fingers open. ~Corrie ten Boom

  3. Hang in there sweetie. I felt the same way going into IVF #1.. I actually said to my therapist, this really isn't that hard. :) We all get a a little cocky.
    I hope your numbers get much better with increased drugs. Thinking of you.

  4. I am crossing my fingers for you....hang in there and just think positive will all be worthwhile in the end...