Wednesday, January 13, 2010


Sunday at church my pastor taught on Luke 1. Luke 1 is the narrative of Zecharia & Elizabeth and the birth of John (the Baptist).

My pastor spent a good 5 minutes talking about Elizabeth. Mostly about the fact that until the angel Gabriel appeared to Zecharia in the temple and foretold John't birth, Elizabeth had been barren. The biblical term for infertile. And she was old, very old.

He must have repeated the phrase "barren woman" at least 20 times. Even going so far as to say how hard it must have been for Elizabeth to be a gatherings and talk to the other women, as children ran around, interacting with their mothers and then having to leave with none of those children.

It was brutal.

I thought at one point I was going to have to leave, but we were sitting smack-dab in the middle of the sanctuary and it would not have gone unnoticed. I held strong, just praying, "Lord, please allow me to have my child before I'm as old as Elizabeth." It was the most I could muster at time.

He moved on eventually.

I have teased for months (and months) now that I am a barren woman. I've told my husband that I'm glad we're in modern times because in biblical days he could have had me stoned for not providing him a child. I think maybe that I identify more with barren than with infertile.



  1. We were watching something on the history channel, and I said, "Good thing we are not royalty". (because I haven't produced an heir). He smiled, kissed my forhead and said, "No love, good thing YOU aren't royalty".... Gotta love that man!

  2. Wow, that would have been hard to listen too. They whole church would have probably heard my sobs (I'm the best at public displays of emotion) I just began to follow your blog, I have read your TTC story, I look forward to hearing good news from you this year and will be checkin in often :)

  3. That's a lot to handle. Way to hang in there. I can't even look at that word--barren--without feeling my heartrate spike.

  4. That's quite a lot to take in on a Sunday morning. You were a trooper to hold it together. I'm not sure I would have been able to be so strong.

  5. I've prayed the "Lord, please let me have a child before I am as old as Elizabeth" too. Somehow, I prefer the word "infertile" to the hopeless "barren". Hang in there.